It’s been a week since Kanna’s summer holidays had commenced. End of the school-year fills me with such a nostalgic feeling.
The very first thought that enters my mind is that my baby is growing up. He has grown a lot taller this year. It is so visible. He is so proud that he is almost as tall as his mom. I, even though was the elder of the sisters, was the shortest person in our house when we were kids. As my kids grow up I will be pushed back to that position once again. Though I’d never considered being short as a limitation, these developments bring forth such memories into my mind. My current position is just temporary and as soon as someone else is ready to take over, I will step down. But then why I hardly feel that my responsibilities would never shrink no matter which position I hold height wise?
The first day of school I am always anxious as I send my baby off to his new classroom. Slowly, as he makes new friends and get comfortable in the new grade and build a good relationship with his teacher, I feel my anxieties dissipating little by little. I remember the smell of new books, the rush to read all the stories in Malayalam and English textbooks, the time spent covering the books with new brown-papers, the happiness to buy new bag, pencil-box, etc., the excitement to meet friends after a gap of 2 whole months – more than the worries it was these little joys that paved our start of school year, every year. I doubt that my parents ever worried about how well I was going to mingle with my friends or how good my teacher was going to be with me. Well, it was a different time in a different place and the roles were carried out by different people where the emphasis was given to studies and marks more than anything.
On the last week of their school, they had an event which they call College Week. Some of the classrooms were turned into sort of a college setting with different activities and subjects. Kids were free to go into any classroom of their choice and learn whatever is taught in that class for the period. Kanna’s choice of classes was completely different from his friends. He came home and told that he enjoyed his choices and that he made some new friends too in the process. I was so proud of my boy who had the sense to follow his heart than his friends whose interests were different. After finishing my schooling, an engineering degree and doing an MBA later, all these years ago, I still feel a bit of out-of-place feel when I follow my heart instead of the crowd. And here my 3rd grader is teaching me to embrace one’s own interest, without words, that is.
End of the school year, I am more emotional than he is. Maybe because it symbolizes how quickly my baby is growing up. Maybe because I experience this emotion too quickly for my liking. Time can never stay still. But my rational mind is looking for ways to freeze these moments for tomorrows. My memory is filled with these drills year after year, yet I can’t let go of any of these moments.
Joining #MondayMusings at Everyday Gyaan.