I have a question for you all. What kind of posts do you enjoy reading here? My personal rants? Stories about Kanna (perhaps the little one’s too in the future)? Gratitude posts? My philosophical posts heavy on the wisdom I hide in my head? Stories on my motherhood experiences?
What makes you read me? Do you have any suggestions for me, to improve my writing, to add in the future posts, topics to write about or do you think I’m awesome as is?
Why I’m asking is not just because I want to know how my readers like my posts but I am finding myself in a position where I’m holding back from sharing. I do write daily or almost daily in my journals.
I have a daily writing book where I write about my day, how I feel and all those gibber-gabbers.
There is a gratitude journal where I used to write daily minimum 3 things I was grateful for till last year. This year I missed writing on it and have started writing on it again from last week and it turns out I’m no longer looking specifically for 3 things to be grateful for. Instead, I’m writing lengthy stories with the essence of gratitude in it. After writing them I am experiencing a sense calmness washing over me, so unlike the past few weeks/months.
I have another book on which I jot down pearls of wisdom from Kanna. As it turns out there are so many of them, he is imparting his wisdom on an alarming rate that I have to keep a pen and paper with me. Recently I started writing letters for Kanna on the same notebook. After all those wisdom nuggets he showers me with I figured that I should also return the favor. I’m thinking maybe for his sweet 17 or his wedding, I would gift this book – for a light hearted reading his childhood pearls of wisdom and when he wants to switch to a heavy dose, my letters simmering with intelligence!
I have another book for noting down quotes and thoughts.
Another for words, idioms, phrases I find interesting.
Yet another for my learnings which include French, yes, I’m attempting to learn French.
So, you see, I’m writing a great deal offline. But when I start typing here I start questioning myself which I think is unnecessary because I’m coming up with no sensible answer and even the questions are not exactly clear to me. I am doubting myself, and in turn, you too, that if I’m writing and publishing read worthy contents and if you actually enjoy reading what I come up with. My writing needs are satisfied through offline writings. I love interacting with you through my blog but I’m not able to reply to all the comments due to the time crunch. That’s going to be yet another project to go back to the old posts and reply to the comments.
I’m writing, but when it is time to share with you here, I go into a state of confusion.
I guess such confusions are born from the inconsistencies in my blogging. Here I’m sitting in my corner of the world posting what I think are awesome stuff and then I fall into the pit of irregular blogging habits, which of course is due to the life that happens away from the screen and then I see that I am able to go about my life without much problem. Yet I wonder, how you are surviving without reading my words. Which brings me back to the realization and I question myself, do my words carry any value at all. So you see, your honest inputs are needed for me to push myself and to try and articulate my thoughts in a presentable and readable manner and finally publish it here for your eyes and mind’s delight.
Do you experience such dilemmas? Or is it just me?
After writing this post I seriously contemplated if I should publish it. In the process of breaking that barrier which is keeping me away from my blog, here I am hitting the publish button.
Linking with #MondayMusings and #MicroblogMondays.