August, being my birthday month, it’s one of my favorite months. But this year that was the only nice thing that had happened in August. It’s too late to write gratitude post for August, I am aware – but sometimes we need to stop thinking about everything else and go with the flow. So today I am choosing to share this imperfect gratitude post with you.
It was a dull month despite the scorching hot sun casting its glare upon the mortals who complained about this constant presence. The monsoon rains failed us miserably. Dark clouds appeared again and again but couldn’t keep up with the hot sun that they disappeared into the thin air just like that! Of course, the dust storms were hopeful, but all it brought was dust and more dust with no much rain to wash it away.
Waiting for the rain proved to be a neverending one. But the pain of the wait was bearable compared to the back pain that became a constant companion of yours truly. Pain rattled out the productiveness that was growing within me and I became disinterested in finishing the projects I was working on. Terrible thing, this pain is. Some nights it managed to even throw off sleep away from me. Mischief managed it must have sniggered.
Things are getting better and I am finding out what works for me. Thirty minutes of the daily walk can do wonders. So now no matter how sick I am, I walk. With the watchful eyes of Mr.Sun pacing the outsides, I finish my walks in the comforts of my house. There is a solution to every problem. It may not be a perfect solution, but we imperfect people should stop waiting for the perfect moments and perfect solutions. Work with what we got. Right?
Kanna’s school opened after summer vacation in August. My 4th grader was so excited and happy to go back to school and meet his friends. I felt a little dejected and abandoned. My prevailing sense knows that this is how it would be and that this is perfectly normal and I am sort of in a relief too – but still the lump in my throat and the heaviness in my chest are working together to put this loving mother to break into a state of “my baby does not want me anymore” rambles more often than not. Hmmph!
Of course, my almost-three-year-old is showering me with kisses and hugs every possible minute. He replies “I lullu Amma” with so much sweetness that I almost forgive him for the kicks he delivers every night without fail on my neck, back, and face.
The push and pull effect these little humans have on us parents are incredible. I want to freeze the moments, but moments are transpiring into years in the blink of an eye. I feel like a clueless 10-year-old who conjured up a mesmerizing future in her mind’s eye and before I knew it everything is evaporating in front of my (mind’s) eyes. I want to yell that this is just my figment of imagination, now give me the time to live this dream. Oh well, time’s up!
All in all, August was an ordinary month with extraordinary levels of disappointment creeping inside my head. However, I feel grateful for this ordinary life and getting to enjoy almost half of my life on planet earth. And that makes up for all the mortal feelings. 🙂
Tell me one thing you are grateful for at this moment.